Name your struggle. Find your light. Find your people.

Recently, friends have reached out with affirmations that my openness about my experience with depression, anxiety, and PTSD has helped them. Being open about my situation is one thing. The truth is, my journey from illness to health is truly a day-by-day and often breath-by-breath practice.

With sincere intentions and research-based methods I have worked to illuminate the benefits of gratitude and positive psychology beyond just self-help and “positive thinking.” However, as I endeavor to apply an authentic mindset, I face lots of mental gymnastics — especially when dealing with very real mental health challenges.

As with physical fitness, emotional health and fitness definitely require exercises that are sometimes very uncomfortable. My relationship with negativity has been a long and challenging one. So often I worked to keep up an appearance of holding it together. “Stay positive. Stay strong. Help others.” It took me a long time to confront, accept, and allow the shadow emotions.

When I realized that speaking and acknowledging my negative thoughts and emotions was critical to my healing, I started to bring them into the light. They were much less daunting.

For me, this took hours of good therapy, doing my “work” between those sessions, and appropriate medication. Friends, family, and colleagues who stood in support of me on the good days and dark days were also paramount to my journey and I am forever grateful for their role.

When one friend reached out recently, it came so naturally for me to share, “We really are all in this together and we are stronger together.” Truth. We may not be in exactly the same boat, but we are all floating around somewhere in ways that bind us more than divide us. At the very least — air, water, and the desire to love and be loved are what we have in common.

Having people in your life with whom you can share and help name the struggle is imperative for stepping into your light. Find those people. Be that person.

I am a survivor, trusted advisor, and coach. I am not a mental health professional. If you are in a crisis, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800–273–8255. Or contact the Crisis Text Line by texting TALK to 741741.

Additional research and information available at: Mental Health America and American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.